Boundaries: How they are developed.

Boundaries were another theme that I saw throughout the year. Some of my clients were wanting to work on how to set better boundaries. Others were discovering how to set them for the first time. While some clients were working through what it felt like to have a boundary placed on them. Boundaries are not always easy or comfortable but boy are they sure important.

Setting boundaries is a critical aspect of maintaining healthy relationships. They are also vital for our overall well-being.

Yet, it can be challenging to know where to start. Boundaries are the limits we set for ourselves in relationships, and they help to establish respect, trust, and clear communication. In this blog, we'll explore three ways to set boundaries.

1. Identify Your Needs: The first step in setting boundaries is to identify your needs. What are your non-negotiables in relationships? What makes you feel comfortable or uncomfortable? Take the time to reflect on your values and identify the behaviors or actions that are unacceptable to you.

2. Communicate Clearly: Once you've identified your needs, it's essential to communicate them clearly to others. Be direct and honest when setting boundaries, and use "I" statements to express how you feel. For example, "I feel uncomfortable when you make jokes about my appearance," or "I need some alone time to recharge."

3. Establish Your Boundaries Consistently: It's essential to restate your boundaries consistently. When someone crosses a boundary, it's crucial to communicate that their behavior is unacceptable and request a change. This could be as simple as ending a conversation or taking a break from the relationship. Enforcing your boundaries sends a clear message that you value yourself and expect to be treated with respect.

In conclusion, setting boundaries is a crucial aspect of maintaining healthy relationships. By identifying your needs, communicating clearly, and enforcing your boundaries, you can establish respect, trust, and clear communication in your relationships. Remember that setting boundaries is not selfish or mean, but rather an act of self-care and self-respect. So take the time to identify your needs, and communicate them clearly to improve your relationships and overall well-being.

Boundary work and knowing your needs is a process. It takes time and consistency. If you are looking to work on boundaries and need support reach out today. As a therapist in Ogden, Utah I can help with discovering your boundaries, how to know they are important to you, and how to express them.

If you are interested in reading a book on boundaries this book, Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself, is a good read.

Good boundaries free you | Sarri Gilman is a great YouTube TedTalk. She is a family therapist and this talk is all about the yes and no of boundaries.